Friday, July 11, 2008

Two years from when???

A recently divorced friend of mine (who read all the books) told me recently that "they" say you shouldn't get into another relationship for two years afterwards. I said, "After what? After you tell your husband you're leaving? After you run away from home? After you file for divorce? Or after the divorce is final?" Two years from when??? (Not that I am looking for anything or anyone at this stage.) I just don't think "they" are clear.

On another note, some have wondered about the path of the flood in Missouri which has since subsided, but I wanted to assure you I am high, dry, and safe. Ok, maybe it's a little wet around here, but I am safe. And remember... all is well. I can swim.

I am including images of the water lapping up on the side of the highway. One exit away from me has been closed for 2 weeks, not just because of the water (which is very close) but because of the deer leaping over the road because they have been displaced by the water. The signs on the highway do warn about the deer leaping over cars which is a strange sign to see. Just had a huge storm tonight, but we are all safe where I am staying for the summer.

Still looking for a job but have decided that I need to go back to the college town from which I moved. I cannot find a job here, and even if I could, I cannot afford to live in the "big city." So I will be moving back to College Town USA in a month or two. Wish me luck. I am pretty tired of being unrooted (not uprooted), uncertain, and on shaky ground. It will feel good to be settled although I doubt I will ever feel settled ever again. (Friends assure me I will one day. "When?" I ask. Perhaps in two years.) Ok, there goes the melo-drama again. My sister has been so wonderful to me for letting me stay here while I am regrouping and recouping, but I have to find a job. Pray for me to find a job. (I have already found a condo to rent and will be moving again in August.)

This is not the way I thought things would turn out, but I continue to be thankful for good health and wonderful supportive friends and family.

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10 Comments:

At 7:52 AM, Blogger Sailor said...

Don't know about a specific measuring point, but I've read similar things as well- 18 months sticks as the "number" that was most often referenced as the magic time.

Hugs, crossing my fingers for a handydandy job.

 
At 10:27 AM, Blogger Ronjazz said...

You hang in there, woman. It's baby steps. One in front of the other. Just keeping walking, because you are walking right through it all. And when the job comes (and it WILL), you'll see the light at the end all too quickly. You'll be all right, I promise.

 
At 10:18 AM, Blogger ~gkw said...

Hmmm, and after MY divorce I thought it was jump in bed with the first warm body that would let you.....

oh, maybe you were speaking of relationships....

 
At 2:40 PM, Blogger justme said...

I think its 3 years......thats how long its always taken me to get over something major.....or another way of looking at it, is that the recovery takes twice as long as the disintegration of the relationship.....
Hang on in there hun!
It will be hard to move again, but sounds like it might be for the best? Anyway, take care....x

 
At 9:04 PM, Blogger Moosekahl said...

I think I said screw the books when I went through my divorce. I relied on the people that really knew me and knew that how I was reacting was okay...even when they hauled my butt to the ER because I was freaking out. Os can attest to that. Two years is a long damn time in my book of experience.

Thanks for the encouraging words on the house. I'm super excited for my new adventure so hopefully that tempers the pain of selling.

 
At 7:37 PM, Blogger hippochick said...

I'm dropping by for the first time. I have no advice about divorce, since I'm celebrating my 40th wedding anniversary next month.

I guess just keep trusting the Lord and your own good common sense. I will be praying for a job for you.

Glad to see from Cheryl's blog that we share a love for Atticus Finch and Gregory Peck.

~hippo hugs~

 
At 3:10 AM, Blogger Marianna said...

I can totally relate about feeling unsettled. I used to dig my heels in so deep that I left marks on the ground. Now? I have no roots. I don't even have a home! Weird...

M~

 
At 9:44 PM, Blogger Im A Foto Nut said...

Ok, having been through it, and knowing it took me 5 years before I knew I was ready, all I can say is that there is no specific time. I believe the idea is to make certain you don't jump for one bad relationship into another, or ever worse, a worse one that you left.

For me it took that long to sort through, grow up, and grow out of bad habits I had created while growing up in an alcoholic household.

The ironic thing is that once you have done all of the work you need to make yourself emotionally healthy and stable you discover there just aren't that many other persons of the opposite sex that fit into the same column of emotionally healthy and stable. What you also realize is that you would rather stay single until the day you die rather than having another bad relationship.

Then like me you will also realize no one is perfect including yourself and start looking for a happy medium, however, being content with where you are in life.

 
At 6:19 AM, Blogger Marianna said...

I will be flying on your bday & won't be in the States til Thursday, so I wanted to wish you a Happy Bday!

M~

 
At 11:45 PM, Blogger Pilot Mom said...

Happy Birthday!!! Hope your day is filled with fun surprises....

 

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